“The Lizard Guard”

I love what the dreamer named this dream. In my workshops on the dreamtime, I encourage participants to name their dreams. The reason for this is two-fold. In naming the dream you consolidate the most important feature of what your inner self is trying to offer your waking mind from the dreamscape. Often without even knowing it at the time of giving it a title, the titles often become the ‘nugget’ of the dream. And, secondly by naming the dream it commits it to memory in a deeper way.

Lizard in shamanic traditions is about dreaming and the dreamtime. I don’t suspect the dreamer knew this at the time she labeled this dream, although I may be incorrect. Lizard is literally seen as the ‘medicine’ of dreamers in many shamanic traditions. Jamie Sams, in one of the first books offered on the symbolism of animal totems, Medicine Cards, suggests in a dialogue between snake and lizard, “Snake you are looking for shade, and I am looking for shadow. Shadow is where the dreams live.”

Gram Twylah suggested that lizards are very perceptive, and they feel the vibrations along the ground. They have amazing hearing capacity and don’t miss any movement with their eyes. Some are able to drop their tail to escape, suggesting that one of the medicine gifts of lizard is the ability to detach from a situation, person, or emotion whose time has come to be left behind. They teach us to choose which path is best for our next step.

The other thing that hit me with the title, is the reptilian aspect of lizard…and that this one is guarding something. A lizard can represent an omen to watch what you are approaching, or clearly a need to choose a different path to move forward. Lizard holds a ‘decree of memory’ and as such a desire to return to a state of mental peace, signifying that we must release certain memories that we carry. Guarding usually means protection. The dreamer noted to me that the date of the dream was in 2015, although this dream had always stuck with her. I would ask her, “What was happening in your life at that time?” Is there a lingering need to still be cognizant of addressing what this dream brought up then, and that’s why it still sticks with you now.

I was concerned about making dinner and had gone to the refrigerator to get some meat to make spaghetti sauce. This house required me to go through the laundry room in order to get to the garage. There was a huge boulder in the laundry room. There was a large bunch of cut basil on top of the washing machine. There were also some other things on the floor and on top of the washer and dryer – clothes or plants?

We start with the acknowledgement that the dreamer is concerned. It is stated right in her first sentence, and suggests this concern is something she is experiencing in some aspect of her life. She goes to the refrigerator. Refrigerators imply keeping thing ‘in the dark & cold’ to ‘keep them fresh & alive.’ So there is a possibility that there is a concern that she has kept hidden (in the dark) or cold (not dealt with) and it is still fresh and alive in her memory. She is going to make spaghetti sauce, which is a food we think of as nurturing, hearty, comfort food….although spaghetti itself can often speak to our entanglements. She needs comforting.

She is trying to get to the garage, a place of storage and usually a space disconnected from the ‘family living place.’ And she has to go through the laundry room. This implies that something needs to be ‘cleaned’-up. But there is a boulder in the way. Her way is blocked from knowing how to do that, or possibly she feels something is blocking her in her life at that time from getting something else she wants or needs to move forward. Perhaps she isn’t even clear what it is she wants, she just feels blocked from cleaning up what she has ‘stored away’ and no longer serves.

There is a bunch of basil on the washing machine. This is what needs attention, the washing machine is symbolic of what she needs to address to clean something up. It is clearly the need to get to the “basil” supposedly in order to make the pasta sauce (self-nurturing). Ironically in shamanic healing traditions, basil is often used to draw away evil, due to its fiery content. In the Mayan tradition bundles of basil (and other herbs depending on the healing taking place) are used to strike or smooth the auric field of a client, helping to pull from the breaks in our light body, the places where we leak our life force energy due to wounds, injuries or frights. This does not mean that something evil is stalking her, you use word play in the dream time decoding, and evil spelled backwards is ‘live’; so something isn’t allowing her to live to her full capacity. Clothes and plants are in the way….there are distractions.

There was a large lizard in the basil – which did not really scare me; I could have picked up the basil, which I wanted to use in the sauce. But there was also a surprising rustle among the things on the floor. I looked and saw the head of another very large lizard. It had huge jaws and mouth, and it was not happy to be disturbed! I wasn’t real scared of it, but I couldn’t get close enough to get the basil and I couldn’t get into the garage. I left.

There is a lizard in the basil. Although she isn’t scared, this lizard (this perception she has) is something more obvious that she is aware of, and could deal with, but there is something even more surprising or buried in her subconscious that is beyond the obvious situation—the new bigger lizard. This rustling on the floor (symbolizing a deeper foundational belief), distracts her from getting the basil for the sauce. Its large head, mouth open, huge jaws and not happy to be disturbed.

There is some old thought and perhaps a past slight or wound that is starting to surface into her awareness. It can’t be buried anymore, the head is exposed and the mouth and jaws large and open suggest this is something she should be cautious of, although again she states she is not afraid to confront it. But she is not ready to fully deal with it, and remove whatever the impact of the past situation is, as she leaves the garage (where she’s stored it) without dealing with it.

I went back into the family room. There was an ibis, or tall grey heron, in the corner. I thought it was a statue and was touching it’s beak thoughtlessly as I passed or paused to think about something. Then I realized it was alive! The poor thing was almost dead! It was dusty. I realized it needed food. It made a sound that made me understand it needed fish. I said out loud, “Oh, you need fish – or sardines. I’ll get some.”

She goes back to where she feels support-the family room, or perhaps this is an indication in the dream that the issue has to do with her family of origin or something happening in her immediate family at the time of the dream. She feels safer by maintaining the illusion that it is either supportive or nurturing. Rooms suggest different stages of one’s life, and family rooms suggest the necessity of strong family communication. This can be interpreted as her family, or her inner family, those parts of herself that make up the pantheon of her inner resources. Here she sees a tall gray heron in the corner.

The corner means something has been put aside or pigeon-holed. In the Medicine Wheel studies with Gram Twylah, gray on the Wheel stands for how we assess a situation and/or where we need to honor ourselves. Heron stands for mothering, it is a divine feminine, majestic, ancient looking bird. Symbolically it seeks quietude and inner-peace. The heron is called on in the indigenous traditions to bring in lofty thoughts and ideals when feeling off balanced, to birth something new, to mother or nurture ourselves past old emotional wounds. It also represents our ancient, divine feminine spirit.

The bird is looking dead and dusty, it is motionless, and it hasn’t been ‘fed’ in a long time. She is even ‘thought-less’ in her approach to it, not realizing how undernourished this part of herself is. I would suggest that this dreamer look at where she may be over mothering others at her own expense; or not nurturing herself by engaging her divine feminine principles in a more fulfilling way; or perhaps is going along in life without a thought as to how to feed her own wants and needs in life.

It indicates almost telepathically that it needs fish; she is speaking to herself here. Fish indicates that something is being brought to the surface; they represent the unconscious mind because they exist under water, which represents emotions. Fish are also an ancient symbol of spirituality, so it can also imply that she knows on some level that she needs to feed her spiritual side to feel more nourished in this world.

So I went into the kitchen because I had some sardines or small fish. But I was distracted by other people (?). There was some kind of discussion that someone wanted fish for dinner. I momentarily forgot about the lizard and heron.

She goes into the kitchen, which is a place of nourishment, but she gets distracted by others from her own needs—both what needs to come to the surface from the shadow or unconscious part of herself (the lizard) and the heron (which is the desperate feminine side of herself that needs nurturing). Other people want fish for dinner, indicating she is taking care of others before herself. This can be family, people at her job, friends or relatives….but they are distracting her from concentrating on herself.

This house was large, white painted wood, on top of a large rocky hill overlooking “expanses.” I believe the ocean was below the hill and there was a long view of hillsides, countryside, in a foreign country.

Houses in dreams usually represent the components and aspects of our mind, or even the physical body. This house is large (she wants to expand). It is painted white. On the Medicine Wheel white stands for boundaries, the boundaries we need to magnetize to ourselves the people, places and mind-sets that can help us to grow; as well as the people, places, and mindsets that we need to release to grow. It is made of wood, which often in dreams is an indication that although things are stable, something inside feels emotionless. It also gives us the means to ‘build on the past’ by creatively changing the structure of what we believe in.

The house is on a large rocky hill. Although the rocks provide stability to her foundation, and the hill gives her far sighted vision, there is a rockiness to her ability to reach them. There is an ocean below the hills, below her enlarged vision, there are deep emotions that come and go in waves. She can take the long view, she is perceptive and can wait, but all this feels ‘foreign’ to her, as if she doesn’t have full ownership of all these parts of herself (foreign country).

I said I didn’t care if we had spaghetti or fish, but that I had to get into the garage and there was a lizard in the way. My husband, Charlie, came behind to help me. We went back to the laundry room.

She doesn’t care if things get entangled (spaghetti) as they are brought to the surface (fish), but she is determined to deal with this lizard, this shadow aspect. Her husband comes to help, indicates that she trusts her husband to either help her uncover what she is trying to bring to the surface, or that he has her back while she discovers this within herself. Again, playing with words, Charlie in old English means free man, so he can help free her from something.

The large lizard was now on the washing machine, eating or guarding the basil. It had a really big head – about 6-8 inches across. It was white and had a fat, short body. I couldn’t really see legs – it was more like a fat snake. The head was scaly and had a horned-toad look to it. The jaws were really big. It kept opening it’s mouth and hissing, or making hissing looks – not sure if actual sound came out. It did not want us there! It was definitely threatening us.

Now the large lizard has risen to the surface, it is no longer hiding under the clothes, and it is guarding the issue which needs to be cleansed and could remove something that is holding this dreamer back from a fuller life. Keep in mind the basil is the issue being guarded, and for her to understand and deal with what that issue is, can remove its hold on her life.

It’s white and fat—there clearly needs to be boundaries before this continues to spread and the issue or belief get larger. She can’t see the legs—there is a question on how to move this forward. It’s more reminiscent of a snake—snakes are all about transmutation and represent the birth, death, rebirth cycle.

Clearly this dreamer is ready to confront something, even though there is a part of her that would prefer it stay buried. There is some resistance as the snake is hissing and giving off vibes that it is feeling threatened, but it is there right in front of her ready to be dealt with. Question: whatever this something in need of change within yourself is, does it feel like it could likewise threaten the marriage? Keep in mind you will be ‘free’ from this unconscious burden and/or what may be inhibiting you from a fuller expression of your deep spiritual feminine if you challenge the hissing. The hissing is your inner warning, but also what you have to move beyond. And the dream shows you that you can rely on your husband, as he is with you.

We began to discuss how we could capture it or get it outside the house. We couldn’t get past it to open the garage door. That would have allowed it to go into the garage and then we could have opened the garage door for it to go out on its own. If we captured it, we could release it up on the hillside by our house. We considered taking it up into the mountains to release it in a more remote area.

You decide together how to get rid of this, so it is outside the house (the place where you both reside) and you can both work on the issue. You can’t bring it into the garage, which is good, because you don’t want to store ‘it’ away anymore. If you capture it (deal with it), you could take it to the hillside. Hillsides signify taking it to a higher level, a higher knowing and mountains indicate that whatever this pressing issue is, you will be able to accomplish your goal. Taking it to a remote area is not giving it as much significance anymore as it might once have had.

That is when I woke up – feeling sad that I had forgotten the sardines for the poor heron. I wanted to go back to sleep so I could feed it.

It was perfect you woke up then. Our dreams often do that to us in the middle of something frightening or sad so we will get the full impact of what our unconscious is trying to bring to the surface for us to deal with. And here it is, the divine part of yourself that needs nurturing, honoring, and needs to be fed to thrive—that is what you are left knowing. You can’t go back to sleep (become unconscious) to deal with this situation and ironically you need to be both awake and aware to correct this for yourself.

Hope that helped and thank you for sharing.

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Who am I Saving? She or Me?

As I have said many times in these dream blogs—dreams imply everything they do symbolically, as well as representing something of ourselves, as that symbol. Example, the little girl is someone outside this dreamer, as well as the ‘little girl’ within the dreamer’s Self. Without divulging too much background, this dreamer is an adoptive parent. I think that is highly important for this dream’s synopsis. If I did not know that, I would still have asked this dreamer what her experience was with children due to the content of the dream. The one thing I do not get to do when decoding dreams on this blog, as opposed to having a detailed dream session with someone, is asking them specific questions that could take the meaning in an alternative direction, or provide deeper analysis.

I have an inkling that this dream also expands beyond the current ‘time frame’ of what’s happening in the dreamer’s life; beyond the current situation she is experiencing, or possibly giving her a warning about the future. Because I know so much about this dreamer’s situation, I see this dream as very specific to what’s happening in her life around adoption.

In indigenous traditions, they view ‘time’ very differently than our culture. We tend to observe time as past, present and future—as a ‘timeline’. In the indigenous cultures they see time as a steady stream happening concurrently from their observation within the Now—from the center of the ‘circle of life’. Hence time is an empirical phenomenon that arises from some underlying notion we have yet to fully define, and which can be observed in many ways. This is where the dream takes us beyond time, and can supply information from the ‘center of all knowing’ to give us a view into what we perceive of as the future. Are we actually creating Then and our observation of what we will encounter in the future, through the Now of the dreaming self?

Hi, I had this dream and it stayed with me this morning so I wanted to put it in your lottery for dreams and see what it may mean.  

I am with a woman who is waiting for her daughter.  She is very upset but I don’t really know why. I just know that things feel off to me.  A lot of people come and go at the beginning of the dream from a house we are in, but I think it is more of an office.  One guy leaves and is supposed to come back and he never comes back.  We are then at a staircase and waiting for the little girl to be brought to us by someone.  We are waiting for a really long time and finally the woman goes to look for the little girl.  I turn around and see 3 wolves coming out of what looks like a fire but it’s not, it’s like a portal coming from the woods and as I watch I find it to be interesting that the lead wolf waits until all wolves are out of the portal and that then the portal shuts.  He doesn’t look at me and I have a feeling that he sees me but just isn’t worried about me.  I turn and hear the mother talking loud and clearly upset.  I am standing at the bottom of the staircase and turned to my right and saw that the fireplace had the same type of fire portal engulfing it.  I look back at the staircase and there is a big man sitting on it with the little girl and he is saying “She has to go! She has to go!!” He has a needle and he is getting ready to put it in her belly but closer to her chest. The mom is behind him crying.  I take in the situation.  I look at him and in my dream I realize – I have to get this girl away from him.  I take her feet and slide her off of him.  He starts yelling “She has to go! You have no idea what you are doing! You are ruining it!” I start running with the little girl.

Then I woke up and my heart was pounding and I was scared.  

I am with a woman who is waiting for her daughter.  She is very upset but I don’t really know why. I just know that things feel off to me. If this were my dream I would suggest that the woman (the dreamer) is waiting for “her daughter”, a child. She is upset and it feels ‘off’ to the dreamer. I think the dreamer may have an underlying doubt and is upset that she might not be able to keep the child once she receives it. Something off, could suggest that because of the adoption agency she is working with, that the biological parent’s rights will take precedence over hers as the adoptive parent. So, both the woman in the dram, and the dreamer feel that level of upset.

A lot of people come and go at the beginning of the dream from a house we are in, but I think it is more of an office.  One guy leaves and is supposed to come back and he never comes back.  Alot of people come and go at the beginning of the dream. Alot of children have come and gone, alot of promises are made, but the children delivered never stay, they end up going. One ‘guy’ (boy) leaves and is supposed to come back, but he doesn’t. I would gather that children have come to her, and just as quickly have been taken from her, never to come back. Possibly this dream happened  after one such incident.

We are waiting for a really long time and finally the woman goes to look for the little girl.  I turn around and see 3 wolves coming out of what looks like a fire but it’s not, it’s like a portal coming from the woods and as I watch I find it to be interesting that the lead wolf waits until all wolves are out of the portal and that then the portal shuts.  He doesn’t look at me and I have a feeling that he sees me but just isn’t worried about me. Finally, after waiting for a really long time—the adoption process can take years, and the biological parental rights can continue to be stretched out, despite incarceration, drug addiction, missing parents, etc. This adoptive mom has waited for the little girl she and her husband have cared for and nurtured for almost two years to be legally theirs. I am sure that has alot to do with the worried content of this dream, it shows her concern/fears and her need to have this resolved.

The little girl is also the ‘lead’ child to have come to them; and the only one thus far who has stayed, despite many ins and outs. I’m going out on a limb here, but possibly there are two more children who will come to these adoptive parents, and stay (represented by the wolves). And then the portal will shut and the family will be complete.

Dreaming of wolves, depends on what you are facing within your life experience as to  their meaning. Wolves are instinctual, they exist in packs and extended families. They often mean you have to face a fear within yourself about something. How do you control that fear and face your doubts? Wolves are also highly intelligent and intuitive. They know how to get in and out of situations, they can track the issue (or animal, situation, scenario of danger) and find a way through.

The dreamer sees them coming from fire or a portal, and there are three of them. There also seems to be a ‘head wolf’ that is not concerned with her presence. Going back to what I suggested above, the little girl (first child that came to them and has not been removed), is not concerned as she knows she will instinctually stay with this family.  That is  message to this dreamer. Three is the number of magic, change and metamorphosis. To me it promises good luck in this adoptive process. The fire represents the dreamer’s passion for bringing this adoption to fruition, and the portal represents a gateway or link to making this little girl their daughter.

I turn and hear the mother talking loud and clearly upset.  I am standing at the bottom of the staircase and turned to my right and saw that the fireplace had the same type of fire portal engulfing it.  I look back at the staircase and there is a big man sitting on it with the little girl and he is saying “She has to go! She has to go!!” He has a needle and he is getting ready to put it in her belly but closer to her chest. The mom is behind him crying.

Both the mother in the dream, and the adoptive mother are upset by all that is happening. The dreamer is at the bottom of a staircase. A staircase, especially standing at the bottom, can signify both confusion on how to hold the circumstances at a higher level of consciousness, and suggests that there have been alot of hurdles to climb. Staircases going up, also imply that you are ready to face your subconscious fears. The fireplace and portal situation again as a symbol represents that there is another situation, possibly in the near future, that will provide a link to more children, or the other two wolves that have not fully appeared in this dreamer’s family life yet. I say that with alot of caution, but I do believe a repetition of a symbol in the same dream is an opportunity for a repeat performance of something relayed earlier. In this case it brings to mind the first portal shown when three wolves came through. Because there is a fire burning, it implies warmth and a fulfillment of one’s desires or needs.

A large man holding a needle in a dream can suggest difficulties and trials ahead. The man represents concerns. The needle can suggest a pointedly intrusive situation. There might be something else that comes up with the current child, or a future child and this is a warning. My first reaction, which I often trust and have been instructed always to pay attention to when decoding, is that the future child this dreamer may receive might have almost been aborted. That’s why the needle is at the belly, and the man is shouting “She has to go.” It could also account for why the mother in the dream is crying, as she either thought the man would agree to keep the child, or perhaps doesn’t wish to abort the child, even  if she needs to give it up for adoption. In this day and age, it can also represent that the father may be a drug addict, and not want to deal with a pregnancy. Most of the children that have come through this dreamer’s door have also had that be a fact in their pregnancy background.

I take in the situation.  I look at him and in my dream I realize – I have to get this girl away from him.  I take her feet and slide her off of him.  He starts yelling “She has to go! You have no idea what you are doing! You are ruining it!” I start running with the little girl.

Whether in the dream, in the ethers, across time/space, it is quite possible that this action of the dreamer in the dreamstate quite literally saves this child’s life (whether in utero or already here), and brings her to this family eventually. Be that a new child, or even overcoming a new obstacle with the present child she is working to adopt.  I am struck by her pulling the child feet first off the man and running with her. Feet represent stability, foundation, and how we walk upon the earth. In that sense the dreamer will bring the children who come to her, stability and a strong foundation of safety, love and nurturing.  And, feet represent the ability to move forward in life, something I pray for, for this dreamer and the children that come to she and her husband.