FEAR

Let’s talk about fear for a minute. There seems to be a lot of it around every corner these days. Fear of covid, fear of the vaccine, fear of not being healthy, fear of the environment, fear that we are not worthy, fear that we are not loved, fear that our elected officials do not have our best interest in mind, fear of aging, fear of speaking our truth, fear of not attaining what we want, desire, or need. I could go on and on.

The problem with fear is that it pulls us off balance. Thoughts are things, and as such if we are in fear, we are not centered because we are reacting, not necessarily acting in our own best interest.

That said, ofttimes in dream scenarios, fear is generated to get our attention around something we are either not paying attention to or as a warning to help us bring something to light.

This dreamer named her dream FEAR, and on Hallowmas, today, ghosts and goblins abound. The tradition of Halloween started in the Celtic festival of Samhain (SAH-win). They would light bonfires and wear masks to scare off the ghosts as the veils between the dimensions are the thinnest at these times. I would like to think that “fear” dreams are simply “masking” something we need to face.

The dream:

Fear
In my dream I suddenly felt that I was in an unsafe or uncomfortable situation. I started planning to “get away”, I was not completely aware of what this situation was or where I was going to go. My youngest son was with me and I instructed him to gather all our stuff from outside & put it in my car, then I rushed him to gather all our stuff in the living area & put that in my car. My car is not that big, but apparently it was all going to fit. It was beginning to feel that we were running out of time to get all our stuff before “someone” was going to discover we were planning an escape and likely try to stop us. The last thing I instructed my son to get was his bedroom stuff. As he ran off to his room, suddenly it was the house he lived in during college, he disappeared up the steps. There were two doors & I wasn’t sure which door my son went up, I chose one door opening it and calling up to my son to hurry. He answered me and I was still at the bottom of the steps waiting for him. I then realized there were two very large ominous looking men standing in an imposing way behind me. They stood shoulder to shoulder, both had black facial hair, both wore black sweatshirts with the hoods up. One of them sends a quick whistle sound – to alert someone? I act like I think maybe they just wanted to go up the stairs. As I begin to feel uncomfortable with their presence I say “Oh, do you want to go up?” To which one of the men answers in a demonic, altered voice “Don’t you look handsome?” What he said didn’t make sense because I’m female, but it was his voice that paralyzed me with fear! I was trembling but reminded myself that when you are feeling an uncomfortable emotion it is best to sit with that feeling than to push it away. I tried to do that and it was making me feel less fearful, but then I woke up still trembling. Calming myself only by realizing it was not reality.

The Decoding:

In my dream I suddenly felt that I was in an unsafe or uncomfortable situation. I started planning to “get away”, I was not completely aware of what this situation was or where I was going to go. My youngest son was with me, and I instructed him to gather all our stuff from outside & put it in my car, then I rushed him to gather all our stuff in the living area & put that in my car.

Right away the dreamer is aware that something is not right. Her plans are to get away from whatever this perceived discomfort is. Possibly there is something in her world that needs to change, but she has yet to figure out in her waking state what direction that will take.

She has her youngest son with her. I would like to have known his name because that would have given me some additional information. Usually as mothers, we try and protect our young, but although this could have something to do with her son, more likely it is what her son represents within herself.

She is looking to gather all her ‘stuff’. Stuff possibly that she has carried with her a long time that is just taking up physical or emotional space and that is time to release. I say that because she is putting it in her car, and the car represents the physical body or place of living. It is also a vehicle that is supposed to move us forward, if it is weighted down, it cannot. All the stuff is in the ‘living area’ indicating she has been living with this ‘stuff’ for a long time.

My car is not that big, but apparently it was all going to fit. It was beginning to feel that we were running out of time to get all our stuff before “someone” was going to discover we were planning an escape and likely try to stop us.

Her capacity to hold the emotional changes in her life feels like it is too big, and yet she holds it anyway, finding a way for it all to ‘fit.’ Is she afraid of herself coming to a conclusion about what needs to change? Is she afraid someone will be hurt her should she make these changes? Is she afraid to make these changes for fear of being chastised or misunderstood by others? Who is this ‘someone or voice’ within herself, that her unconscious self (dreamer) wants her to become aware of?

The last thing I instructed my son to get was his bedroom stuff. As he ran off to his room, suddenly it was the house he lived in during college, he disappeared up the steps. There were two doors & I wasn’t sure which door my son went up. I chose one door opening it and calling up to my son to hurry. He answered me and I was still at the bottom of the steps waiting for him.

Again, she sends her son, which represents something within herself as he is merely an aspect of herself through what he represents in the dream, to go collect stuff in the bedroom. Bedrooms in dreams represent places where we recharge. Our ability to dream for the future; and it was the house her some lived in at college. College represents wanting or needing to learn something about her past to safely move forward in her future.

He goes up the stairs, representing going to a higher level of understanding or consciousness. There are two doors. Doors represent passageways, new opportunities, or changes. If they are open it means you are willing to pass through them. If they are closed it can mean either you haven’t taken advantage of something yet, or you feel the opportunity has passed you by.

Two on the Wisdom Wheels represents how to assess our life to live more of our truth. It also signifies how we choose to honor ourselves, or not. In the tarot, it represents the High Priestess, a major arcana card which is about the inner work needed before we bring it out in a balanced way to work with in our outer world. In numerology it is about partnership, harmony, and duality. Does this mean within herself, or with partnership, that she might wish to revisit? Is she conflicted when she considers this?

I then realized there were two very large ominous looking men standing in an imposing way behind me. They stood shoulder to shoulder, both had black facial hair, both wore black sweatshirts with the hoods up. One of them sends a quick whistle sound – to alert someone? I act like I think maybe they just wanted to go up the stairs.

Here we have the number 2 again. Being taken off-guard by two intimidating men wearing black feels ominous, but infact this is the important part of the dream where your dreaming self wants to fully get your attention. It could refer to feeling you will be taken by surprise around something in your waking world, especially if you let go of your past “stuff” or contemplate another relationship.

Black on the Wisdom Wheels is about ‘listening’ to yourself, your needs, your desires. It is a color of power, mystery, and inner strength. Black facial hair indicates you are potentially hiding something from yourself concerning your own wants and needs. Dressed in black indicates indecision not evil. And hoods indicate the crown chakra is covered, and hence as a dream symbol that you are not listening to your higher self or need to go to the higher levels of awareness to realize this information or new beginning. (Think of your son running up the stairs previously as the same metaphor.)

As I begin to feel uncomfortable with their presence I say “Oh, do you want to go up?” To which one of the men answers in a demonic, altered voice “Don’t you look handsome?” What he said didn’t make sense because I’m female, but it was his voice that paralyzed me with fear!

Where are you uncomfortable in your present state of affairs? It might be confusing because the symbology of this dream symbol (2 intimidating men-which are actually aspects of yourself), is asking you to addresses your inner masculine or your Divine Masculine. With the suggestion that you ‘look handsome’ although you are in a female physical body, redirects you to that aspect of yourself. We are both (Divine Feminine and Divine Masculine), no matter our gender or gender affiliation. The voice is altered to further to get your attention. And you are literally asking yourself: “Do you want to go up?” Do you wish to go deeper into the realms of the higher mind to find your answers?

What is your relationship with your inner masculine? Do you feel protected or that you always need to assume that role in your outer world? Do you only do it for others, or give that gift to yourself as well? These are all things to contemplate for change or a new direction, so you are not in fear or paralyzed to move forward.

I was trembling but reminded myself that when you are feeling an uncomfortable emotion it is best to sit with that feeling than to push it away. I tried to do that, and it was making me feel less fearful, but then I woke up still trembling. Calming myself only by realizing it was not reality.

This is brilliant. You know what you need to do on one level to stay calm and centered. You actualized that in the dreamstate, which means you can actualize that in your waking world, wherever these impending changes take you.

Thank you, dreamer, for sharing. Happy Samhain everyone. If we address our own ghosts and goblins the dark or unknown becomes the light and known.